Tankar och dikter

Have managed to get me to celebrate father’s day, such a rainy day.
The first thing you look up when I woke up today was about that man again.
He apparently will be laser-husband number two, and the large thick text writes he had Asperger throughout the country opens its eyes and may now be thinking that they which are dangerous.
Many who know me would surely raise a hand and say that I am one who has it, and she is damn morbid in mind. No more than from ordinary people without letters, circumstances affecting everything and experiences of the different stages of life we ended up in. But certainly, the more to write me and say you’re wrong and know nothing, to some extent, you are what you describe about Asperger’s, okay then it may be so.
I know that after several weeks rotande in this man’s life manage to find one small catch, and he was distinguishing children including dangerous in other words, as all other people who have lots of different problems bigger one we will once outside the conversation topic, and now will be examining the various psychological tests to take effect. It should be checked up before getting a job or get behind a school desk in public what you have to condition, spare me from this out of hard and generalizing, I hear everywhere how people are talking about distinguishing children, some of us still live to learn from them, and not from a reporter who never in his life have to concern themselves with Asperger’s, he or she, I would like to tick off properly.
I know hooked me up really not because I am struck more than simply point out that I do not live up to all those minus signs that people think about distinguishing children, including people I’ve met in my life. Judgement itself may have different problems both with identity crises, etc. but it does not matter, it is normal in society today, it was a few years ago also was generalized to the streets yes I think of sexual deviation as it called for a second think of it .
But now everything has been used instead of the one that flare up something completely different, which for years has been studied, but not until something happens where someone happens to have some kind of problem, when one begins to talk loudly about it.

The world I find myself in is never easy, the few friends I let into my life has felt the same.

Being inside or outside as well, they never managed at home, in school, so they made their way out among the people, somewhere it went wrong and where fate is in our own hands.

With a little help and support perhaps we may regain strength again, I miss those friends an awful lot, both those who have another life today and those who passed away, we’d love to take back time. It was so up in himself and those amateur parties where people get that little child again, jumping around and fighting for the show say cool, then we sit they here in the midst of their own types, either stuck with or refrain.

I myself grew up as ice, k, a ghetto community learned early on what appeared in the taste or not, always thought of myself as outside. Therefore I refused to follow the norm in this society knew that it’s not me then. And some even say get to know me in real life there are those who see who I am and who love me, from everywhere they can come and smell to my old life.

Refuge are to survive all the tragedies, they only been there for me have gone away, since there are few left who are like them, I try to keep good contact with, as best I can.

But not always easy when I try to process my problem, with or without help.

I try to be here in the present, and their thoughts are many, both then and now, but try to proceed as I said forward. With new strength and energy and forget those who are not worth the effort, they may see for themselves how it is a day, sometimes it is hoped it so they know what it is about.

And even those who experienced it dares to show others the way, not only to escape and pull.

I’m trying to still listen to, but for the hurricane to deal with its own I know.

Luckily, I find the strength from my dearest both here and on the other side.

Even if one is to appreciate the here and now, I can not help but miss and think about the others, they had a special influence on me. If that hope for me was not looking and if I was struggling to fix it one day.

Friday evening right now I’m sitting here in two minds, I stick out my nose.
Have just been at home and brought medicine, but want to try to stop limiting myself.
Now I’m sober and fully conscious, go past any old place health at drunk people. In any case I can not drink it is useless even if I had wanted, but that I can not to compromise as well. Anyone who believes that with everything I had and still fights do wrong, we are all different some are trying to escape from it by binge which I do not understand. When I once tried the only two glasses of red wine, I got down since the middle of the night I would up and collapses on the floor, for that reason I’ll take it easy little offense well.
But then one is not directly used to it and the gym is closed, plus I like the company of people with experience if I’m going there.
Sounds silly perhaps, but since I have it in the family here so we know more what is good and no, the medication is clearly good for me I know, but from the standpoint that this whole uproar restriction still comes into force is more a well- pronounced now, and say to hell, but now you have to do things! Little you saying that you have ever hit the wall so that I and some others with me, say it now and try to strong medication that is needed in some cases to make things so superbly lively.
Anyone who says it to me to even get something in my head then I’m tethered to force them to electric shocks, only then understand them as I go through, just as many more just that I have not had a way to turn to, none of them closer than my dear friend who comes close to the kind of panic anxiety that I have.
Aggressive panic anxiety is not fucking easy, it has been in the picture all the time just that it was weak and barely mention offense for me, because then I drank it away yes I did.
But each stronger and more tangible in the end one can not escape but must face the facts it will close by storm rose.

I feel much better today, began the first day of work practice.
Moreover, I come through without rapid heartbeat and shortness of breath, suddenly yesterday when the news was on TV they said it is a virus, which was lucky because otherwise I would have thought that there was something wrong with just me?
I know, but I just had a panic anxiety attack about the same time because everything looked as it did.
In addition, I have not been out in social work since I moved from Southern Sweden.
Moreover, to go home for a long time makes me a bit funny in public, though now I know that it is not so bad.
I was really happy today working for home care for the better, but certainly the one that gives me nothing new start, new foot into normal rhythm and mental activity.

We are a total of 31 people who say this service runs through LSS, as some might imagine when I go over the diagnosis Aspersers / Add so you know, I know said that my B-log would only contain poems mostly, I think it does.
Sometimes I can be surprising and invite people to an update of my day.
However, today I felt good, happy to write about when it adds something for others as well.
A B-log is to bring something not just about makeup, clothes and latest fashion in my age bother you, but not as much anymore, not for me anyway hunt less as before.
I dress for me what feels good and putting my make up for the fun but not always, before it was just to go and buy milk at the ICA to talk about change ha-ha wonder how it is that 40 year old ha-ha big soft trousers straggly hair and saying nothing. No, but this I will never get it, I know, in my family we refuse to grow old prematurely it is in the genes apart from her mom every grizzled and old before their time.
A little comedy there must be also said that everything is not as important anymore to the same extent as before, hell people can be gravity take me as I am like no other.