Tankar och dikter

Jag vågar inte titta men måste.

Vågar jag se det här.

När ditt namn nämndes kände jag en kall våg.

Vågar jag se det här och höra dina ord igen.

En person som givit mig insikt på kort tid.

Eller har det alltid funnits en som du i min närhet.

Ditt ansikte är likt det närmaste man kan komma den ängeln.

Med brister som står ut ur mängden.

Du klär av dig inför alla men just för mig.

Känns som att du klär av mig också.

Känns som att du gräver ur det .

Jag kan inte stå emot då din mentala styrka över mig finns där.

Och oavsett anar jag att det alltid kommer vara så.

Men jag lyssnade och såg.

Jag lyssnade och iakttog dina ögon samt din mun.

Du knäppte med fingrarna som alltid.

En nervös liten blick då och då ned i marken.

En liten röst som jag känner igen bakom allt mystiskt.

Det mystiska är borta nu och där med andas jag ut .

I try to look straight but I know my wrongs for sure

This lies and untrue stories have to stop…

I cannot handle this anymore, and people may think me being paranoid

Go ahead think what you think; at least I know I love my darling.

I love him to much that it suffocate us both, I strangle the truth from coming out.

Because I want to hear it my way, so then I can run off whiteout getting hurt.

However, in the end I get hurted and sicken tired of this shit all the time.

Do not give me some good advices I know my wrongs and my mistakes.

I keep them to myself anyway, and you can listen if you want to, or try to speak me the right way.

But propibly ain`t you the right one to speak to do right things always, I think you have a hard time explain even your own falls and wrongs, but you wont admit them, you don’t think I am worth answer for, you write about that people don’t need to ask you something you wont tell anyway…well if you say and write it will become unsure answers back.

I guess this blog will be different from what I wrote before; I do not write it so you people can judge me.

Because this is only words written by me, and I talking true about what I feel, where I stand.

I hate to feel like a coward person that has to sit quiet, because you want me to be that way.

Even if I love somebody, they all want to change me, from what they like to have in front of them.

I am nothing of what you people made up in your minds, I am me Carina and no one else can change that, and if you think I talk about the same things all the time, fuck off I do it cause you people seem to forget what I told you last time, to get heard by people I have to tell the same damn thing again and again!

I begin with who I am

Listen to music and write poems

I start to stand up for my own rights

I have always gone my own way in life

Some people stay with me and some take off

Sorry to say but I am not like you and you can surtain not be me.

Spit on me or throw words you’ve already done that in my life

Before you do it this time…pleas, look your self in the mirror

In addition, change of what is you’re wrongs and misbehavers

Because we all have, but you would not admit it

It will keep hunting you until the day you die

I love you and I do anything for you

Besides change my self for some one else

This is my personality and me

This is I and what you get from me no golden pennies and a paradise Iceland

I am human like you but I can admit my wrongs

I am proud to be something but not like you

Unique or not well that is not my thing to judge really

However, for some reason I just give a shit about this right now.